Tapati's Labyrinth

Tapati's Labyrinth http://tapatim.multiply.com/ If you would like to add me to your contacts, please give me a little information about you first. I will warn those who are still passionate about Gaudiya Vaishnavism that this may not be the blog for you to read, as it may present contrary viewpoints. If you are very open and broad minded about spirituality, then you may like some of my material. If I know you in real life, be sure to let me know. I have another, active blog at livejournal and that's where I do most of my networking under the user name tapati. I am planning to use this site more for spiritual blogging and am not really trying to build a network here--though I welcome thoughtful and interesting feedback. Blessed be--Tapati Bio: I began my journey as a child fascinated by the mystical. I sought spiritual experience at every opportunity, but they were few and far between in my lukewarm Protestant family. I became a Catholic at the age of 13, then started looking again at 15 when they no longer answered my burning questions. My search led me through every religion they had a book about in our library until I found Hinduism. My friend Carolyn and I celebrated Krishna Day before we even knew about ISKCON. Later we found an ad for Krsna Book on a box of incense. We became registered members writing to Swarup Das in L.A. I joined the St. Louis temple, moved on to Chicago and out to L.A. (My friend Carolyn was basically deprogrammed by her family.) I married and had 2 kids (later divorcing my abusive husband), left ISKCON in 1979 over the appointed guru issue, practiced KC until 1989, after I came out as lesbian. There seemed no place for me there. Gravitated to paganism where I remain in an eclectic practice. I love to read the Buddhists also and really appreciate the Unitarian Universalist Church for it's stance on individual religious choice. Later I came to realize that I am bisexual. I met Dave in 1996 and we married in 1998. I have two grandsons who bring me great joy every day. Dave has become a Grandpa. I am a lifelong Democrat and active in liberal causes. I have volunteered on a suicide crisis line and continue to stay in touch, I may go back after a bit of a break. I donate regularly. I have been active in Triangle Speakers, an organization that goes into schools and businesses to educate students about GLBT issues in the hopes that future generations won't think we are evil people all out to corrupt them--because we aren't. I am dealing with a number of health challenges, the most serious of which are heart disease and migraines. Hobbies: Gardening, sci fi, mysteries, cooking, social activism, suicide crisis line counseling, filling up my ipod. Music I listen to (not a full list): Ani DiFranco, Tool, Libana, Metallica, "classic rock", blues--Koko Taylor, r&b, NIN, Pink Floyd, Tempest, and other eclectic genres/groups. The older I get, the more my tastes widen. I can enjoy classical in some settings but coming from a working class background I didn't grow up appreciating it and don't seek it out. Thu, 21 Aug 2008 00:41:11 -0000 Tue, 19 Aug 2008 20:24:48 -0000 Tapati's Labyrinth http://images.tapatim.multiply.com/logo http://tapatim.multiply.com 100 100 Stuck inside your mind Once in awhile I read about people who have illnesses or injuries that trap them inside a body that can't function or communicate--with an awake and aware mind. We had a discussion about this on one of the pagan forums I visit. I was reminded of this song by Ani DiFranco: Back, back, back In the back of your mind are you learning an angry language? Tell me, boy Boy Boy, are you tending to your joy, or are you just letting it vanquish*? Yeah, back, back, back In the dark of your mind where the eyes of your demons are gleaming Are you mad Mad Mad about the life you never had Yeah, even when you are dreaming? Who are these old, old, old people in these nursing homes Just scowling away at nothing? Like big rag dolls Just cursing at the walls and pulling out all of their stuffing Yeah, every day is a door leading back to the core Yes, old age will distill you And if you're this, this, this full of bitterness now Some day it will just fill you When you sit right down in the middle of you... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1441/Stuck_inside_your_mind Tue, 19 Aug 2008 20:24:48 -0000 Global Voices Online I heard recently about <a href="http://www.globalvoicesonline.org/">Global Voices Online,</a> which translates blogs from around the world into other languages so most of us can access them. It's amazing! Read news you probably won't hear about anywhere else. http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1440/Global_Voices_Online Sat, 16 Aug 2008 15:06:01 -0000 You Can't Judge Heart Disease Risk By Appearance Alone Finally, evidence of what the fat acceptance movement has always said (based on comparisons between fat people in their native cultures vs. those who move to America and live a less heart healthy lifestyle): <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/diet.fitness/08/12/obesity.heart.ap/index.html">Overweight doesn't always mean heart risks</a> and normal-weight people aren't always heart-healthy! Excerpt: <blockquote> CHICAGO, Illinois (AP) -- You can look great in a swimsuit and still be a heart attack waiting to happen. And you can also be overweight and otherwise healthy. A new study suggests that a surprising number of overweight people -- about half -- have normal blood pressure and cholesterol levels, while an equally startling number of trim people suffer from some of the ills associated with obesity. The first national estimate of its kind bolsters the argument that you can be hefty but still healthy, or at least healthier than has been believed. The results also show that stereotypes about body size can be misleading and that even "less voluptuous" people can have risk factors commonly ... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1439/You_Cant_Judge_Heart_Disease_Risk_By_Appearance_Alone Tue, 12 Aug 2008 23:32:57 -0000 Without A Net My husband is always telling me that I must write my book because no one seems to know about the experiences of poor and working class people in their own words. I hadn't heard about it before, but there's already a book by working class women that does just that: <a href="http://www.amazon.com/Without-Net-Experience-Growing-Working/dp/1580051030">Without A Net: The Female Experience of Growing Up Working Class.</a> Contributors include Dorothy Allison, Diane Di Prima, Terri Griffith, Daisy Hernandez, Frances Varian, Eileen Myles, Shawna Kenney, Siobhan Brooks, Terry Ryan, and more. There's an excerpt by Frances Varian <a href="http://books.google.com/books?id=Ut7Eb4j0UooC&pg=PA161&dq=without+a+net+frances+varian+getting+out&sig=ACfU3U3qVPm-84gspKmU-PNnScnO42tJiQ#PPA161,M1">here.</a> You can read other excerpts by clicking on the "more about this book" link. http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1438/Without_A_Net Fri, 8 Aug 2008 22:20:45 -0000 Dear Senator McCain I submitted this via the Senator's office contact form online. Senator, I am shocked by your recent "Britney" ad against your fellow Senator Obama. I looked up to you as one of the few people on the Republican side I could respect and even hoped that maybe some day you would join my party--which I expressed in a 2004 message to this office. I always figured that if you ran for president that at least I wouldn't have to be fearful of our side losing the election because you would be honorable and could work effectively with members of my party. I appreciated your candor and willingness to stand up for unpopular ideas--some from my own party--no matter what anyone else said. Even in your primary against an opponent like Romney you kept the high ground. Now I hear you say you are proud of an ad that compares Senator Obama, who has spent his adult life trying to serve his community and society, to such people as Paris Hilton and Britney Spears, known mostly for clubbing and flashing their bo... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1437/Dear_Senator_McCain Sun, 3 Aug 2008 20:56:19 -0000 Sleep apnea boosts death rate from multiple causes (copied from CNN, bolding mine, coincidentally just got back from a follow up sleep study last night and am glad I use a CPAP!) <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2008/HEALTH/conditions/08/01/healing.sleep.ap/index.html">Sleep apnea boosts your risk of death, study shows!</a> *WASHINGTON (AP) * -- Shakespeare once called sleep the "balm of hurt minds." Bodies, too, apparently. People with the severe form of apnea, which interferes with sleep, are several times more likely to die from any cause than are folks without the disorder, researchers report in Friday's edition of the journal Sleep. The findings in the 18-year study confirm smaller studies that have indicated an increased risk of death for people with apnea, also known as sleep-disordered breathing. "This is not a condition that kills you acutely. It is a condition that erodes your health over time," Dr. Michael J. Twery, director of the National Center on Sleep Disorders Research, said in a telephone interview. People with such disorders "have been sleep deprived for perhaps very long periods of time, they are struggling to sle... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1436/Sleep_apnea_boosts_death_rate_from_multiple_causes Fri, 1 Aug 2008 18:19:27 -0000 Kentucky Women Three men were sitting together bragging about how they had given their new wives duties. The first man had married a Woman from Illinois and had told her that she was going to do dishes and house cleaning. It took a couple days, but on the third day he came home to see a clean house and dishes washed and put away. The second man had married a woman from Michigan . He had given his wife orders that she was to do all the cleaning, dishes, and the cooking. The first day he didn't see any results, but the next day he saw it was better. By the third day, he saw his house was clean, the dishes were done, and there was a huge dinner on the table. The third man had married a girl from KENTUCKY. He told her that her duties were to keep the house cleaned, dishes washed, lawn mowed, laundry washed and hot meals on the table for every meal. He said the first day he didn't see anything, the second day he didn't see anything, but by the third day some of the swelling had gone down and he could see a l... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1435/Kentucky_Women Tue, 29 Jul 2008 22:54:55 -0000 Differences over religious duty Seen on the blog of Advaitadas: Although most western devotees have been initially taught that all westerners go to hell because they don’t follow the Vedic principles and that ‘ignorance is no excuse’, when I told this to Sadhu Baba he laughed and thought I had told him the joke of the year. Later, when studying the teachings of Vijay Krishna Gosvami, I understood why – “Although not every human being has the same duties, obligations and ethics, there is morality according to country, society and time. Whatever is thus considered decent is accepted, and unless and until it is understood and realised to be wrong and unjust it should certainly be followed. Whatever I believe to be my duties and propriety that is my religious principle. If one doesn’t follow one’s fundamental religious principles one meets with woe and commits sin according to one’s local, social and temporal customs and ethics. Whatever obligation and ethics one believes in and accepts with a simple heart, that is one’s... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1434/Differences_over_religious_duty Tue, 29 Jul 2008 20:05:21 -0000 Quote: Hair Braiding Meditation I found this in a Buddhist magazine and had to chuckle: Hair Braiding Meditation By Polly Trout May I be filled with lovingkindness. May I be well. May I be peaceful and at ease. May I be happy. May my daughter, who wants a billion tiny little braids this morning, be filled with lovingkindness. May she be well. May she be peaceful and at ease going to school with a billion tiny little braids. May her best friend, who got a billion tiny little braids put in her hair at Club Med Ixtapa last week, be filled with lovingkindness. Also her mother, may she be peaceful and at ease. And the woman the mother hired to do all that cornrowing, may she be well. May she be happy. May I be filled with lovingkindness as I put in these billion tiny little braids. May I be peaceful and transcend greed. Also, may I go to Club Med Ixtapa next season, when the beach will be even more inspiring due to my newly enlightened and greed-free state. May I be happy. May my coworkers be filled with lovingkin... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1433/Quote_Hair_Braiding_Meditation Sat, 26 Jul 2008 19:09:36 -0000 R.I.P. Randy Tausch <a href="http://www.cnn.com/2008/SHOWBIZ/books/07/25/obit.pausch/index.html">Randy Pausch, famous for his Youtube video of his final lecture, dies at 47 from pancreatic cancer.</a> I saw him give the same lecture on the Oprah show recently. It was amazing and I am sure at least part of the credit goes to the parents who instilled the values he lived by and provided such a good start in his life. It is a shame he couldn't have more time with his own children. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji5_MqicxSo&feature=related http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1432/R.I.P._Randy_Tausch Fri, 25 Jul 2008 19:01:12 -0000 The Music of the Spheres http://www.halfsatori.com/2008/07/celebration-of-life.html My friend Ananda's inspirational doodles about consciousness dancing through the cosmos to the universal beat. http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1431/The_Music_of_the_Spheres Tue, 22 Jul 2008 21:13:34 -0000 In Defense of the Lowly Legume Legumes and indeed, all carbohydrate-based foods these days, often get a bad rap. However, in defense of legumes they do have a lot of good things to offer and have been a vital mainstay of poor people's diets throughout the world and down through the ages. The fiber they provide help prevent some of the diseases of the colon that modern low fiber diets have contributed to. (I had zero polyps when I was examined on '06--the doctor said that's very rare for someone my age in America.) Fiber is also good for a heart-healthy diet since it helps lower cholesterol. Here's some more information for anyone wanting to make an informed decision about the role of legumes in their diet, perhaps in moderation and with an application of Beano. Nutrition           During the lean years of the Great Depression, beans were also tagged "poor man's meat" because of their protein power at pennies per pound. Beans are a source of Niacin, Thiamin, Riboflavin, B6 vitamins and many ot... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1430/In_Defense_of_the_Lowly_Legume Mon, 21 Jul 2008 17:30:34 -0000 Zoo Photos L.A. 6-29-08 Dave and I went to the L.A. Zoo on Sunday, June 29th. Here are a few of the animal shots that were clear enough to see. It was a hot day and many animals were lying down and blended so well with their environment you could barely see them in the http://tapatim.multiply.com/photos/album/39/Zoo_Photos_L.A._6-29-08 Thu, 17 Jul 2008 08:47:18 -0000 Our family murder mystery Cecil Earl Paris, 31 year-old night watchman at the Keokuk Box Factory plant on Commercial Alley, was shot and killed some time Saturday night by an unknown assailant who was armed with a .22 caliber revolver. The body was discovered on Sunday morning by Walter Bryant, the day watchman. The body had been pushed under a lumber wagon about forty feet from the doorway of the boiler room at the plant. There was a sack of coal found near the building. Police believed he was shot when he ordered someone off the premises. His own .32 caliber revolver was missing and believed stolen. Money had also been removed but a cheap watch was untouched. Three charcoal tablets had been wrapped in a paper that they think the murderer mistook for a bill and were found on the ground along with the paper. "A sister of the murdered man told the coroner who told the officers that a week ago her brother had accosted a man in the boiler room and ordered him out." Henry Faber was the police officer who responde... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1429/Our_family_murder_mystery Tue, 15 Jul 2008 01:35:21 -0000 Ludo - Love Me Dead Music video by Ludo performing Love Me Deadwith Andrew Volpe(C) 2008 The Island Def Jam Music Group This cracks me up and the music is good too. Artist: Ludo Album: You're Awful, I Love You Year: 2008 Title: Love Me Dead Love me cancerously Like a salt-sore soaked in the sea. 'High-maintenance' means You're a gluttonous queen Narcissistic and mean. Kill me romantically Fill my soul with vomit Then ask me for a piece of gum. Bitter and dumb You're my sugarplum. You're awful, I love you! CHORUS She moves through moonbeams slowly She knows just how to hold me And when her edges soften Her body is my coffin I know she drains me slowly She wears me down to bones in bed Must be the sign on my head That says, oh... Love me dead! Love me dead! You're a faith-healer on T.V. You're an office park without any trees Corporate and cold Gushing for gold Leave me alone. You suck so passionately You're a parasitic, psycho, filthy creature finger-bangin' ... http://tapatim.multiply.com/video/item/19/Ludo_-_Love_Me_Dead Sat, 12 Jul 2008 16:15:04 -0000 Laugh Attack The other night we were looking at the offerings of our cable's "On Demand" feature. I thought it would be amusing to see what porn offerings they had, even though I don't really like the x-rated stuff. I just wanted to see what they had, maybe they had one of the classics like "Wifemistress" or "Emmanuele." I had been coughing so much that my ribs and back hurt, so I was trying to avoid doing anything that would use those muscles. But when I saw the titles I couldn't help but laugh, especially when I saw "12 inch Attack." For some reason that title just struck me as particularly funny and I was off in one of those laughing fits where you just can't stop yourself and can hardly come up for breath. I guess it represented everything that was ridiculous about...well the kind of men who care that much about impressing everyone with their penis length. I thought I'd die before I could stop. I would start to wind down and then I'd think of it again and be off, though it hurt so much I was simult... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1428/Laugh_Attack Tue, 8 Jul 2008 21:53:22 -0000 Osho on Guilt I'm not a follower of Osho but I recently read this quote and what it says about religion, guilt, and social control is in line with my own observations. You have to realize that for most of human history religion has been aligned with government, and as such it was an enforcer of social norms and controls required by each government. You can see the culture wars in America as being a struggle between this idea that religion (specifically Christianity) should control our behavior and the idea that we alone should decide what is right and wrong and that should not be imposed on us by religion. While I don't believe in wallowing in guilt, taking responsibility for one's actions is of course the right thing to do, including making amends whenever necessary. Guilt, however, never helped anyone. BELOVED OSHO, I FEEL SO GUILTY WHEN WANTING TO EXPRESS MYSELF AND WHEN I FINALLY TAKE COURAGE TO DO SO, IT FEELS MORE LIKE A NO TO OTHERS THAN A YES TO MYSELF. THEN THE GUILT RETURNS BECAUSE OF THIS. ... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1427/Osho_on_Guilt Tue, 8 Jul 2008 21:37:32 -0000 Keokuk Iowa Informational Video (my home town) Video of Keokuk Iowa located in the Southeast corner of Iowa.Produced by Ed Vinson. See www.keokuk.com for more http://tapatim.multiply.com/video/item/18/Keokuk_Iowa_Informational_Video_my_home_town Sat, 5 Jul 2008 00:26:44 -0000 Hendrix - Star Spangled Banner (best angle) Jimi Hendrix rocks out the Star Spangled Banner, with intro by Little http://tapatim.multiply.com/video/item/17/Hendrix_-_Star_Spangled_Banner_best_angle Fri, 4 Jul 2008 23:47:00 -0000 Pictures of my trip You can see some of the photos from our trip to Malibu <a href="http://www.gaudiya-repercussions.com/index.php?act=module&module=gallery&cmd=user&user=2&op=view_album&album=83">here.</a> We also went to the L.A. zoo. I used a disposable to take the zoo photos and I will post those as soon as they are developed. Of course I always get a digital copy to upload. It was quite hot at the zoo and I was grateful I chose to get an electric wheelchair for the day. Everything was quite spread out and I wouldn't have been able to walk very far. (Normally I could walk a couple of miles but with my foot injury I had to stop walking and I am out of condition to do such things. I'll have to build back up to that gradually.) As it was, just getting to the rental station was a trial, from the parking lot and up a lot of steps. We didn't get to see everything but I estimate we saw about 2/3 of the zoo. I of course prioritized the primates given my Anthropology background. It was exciting to see the gorillas (while they are still in existence!). We saw a lion but like a lot of the animals he was kicking back in the shade and could... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1426/Pictures_of_my_trip Mon, 30 Jun 2008 19:16:03 -0000 Malibu memories In June of 2008 we traveled to Malibu and took pictures of the area in which I was homeless with my first husband and small children at Leo Carrillo State Park. The park exists in a landscape studded with million dollar plus mansions, creating a surreal effect for those of us who were essentially homeless there. (We weren't the only http://tapatim.multiply.com/photos/album/38/Malibu_memories Mon, 30 Jun 2008 18:35:27 -0000 One Week After California Lifts Ban on Gay Marriages Rinku Sen responds to news that California has extended marriage to gay and lesbian couples and that a number of those unions include people of color. http://tapatim.multiply.com/video/item/16/One_Week_After_California_Lifts_Ban_on_Gay_Marriages Thu, 26 Jun 2008 16:45:45 -0000 Pro Life is Anti-Woman - George Carlin Thoughts on Abortion.....How did chickens get involved in this?Because they are decent people. http://tapatim.multiply.com/video/item/15/Pro_Life_is_Anti-Woman_-_George_Carlin Wed, 25 Jun 2008 15:25:47 -0000 R.I.P. George Carlin <a href="http://www.deadlinehollywooddaily.com/rip-george-carlin/">George Carlin died yesterday of heart failure</a> at St. John's Hospital in Santa Monica. George had a history of heart disease. In his own words: <blockquote> Q. Somewhere in there I was reminded of the bit on your Web site where you talk about your second heart attack at Dodger Stadium. And somewhere in there you say, "The Mets beat the Dodgers. Fuck the Dodgers." I was thinking, "That's a New Yorker." Carlin: Yeah, they tore a hole out of this city when they left. I was a young Dodger fan at that time. I was in my late teens, approaching 20. I had spent all of my young life adoring them for their non-corporate image and their warm, human, fallible, blue collar, beer-drinking image, whereas the Yankees were U.S. Steel corporate and the account executives and Wall Street guys were there. Now that has switched. Now the Mets, who were my National League choice, have that kind of suburban following, and the Yankees have the pot-smoking Third-World people in the stands. It's a little generalization on both s... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1425/R.I.P._George_Carlin Mon, 23 Jun 2008 20:28:29 -0000 Yet another Santa Cruz County Fire A fire broke out this afternoon in Watsonville, the south end of Santa Cruz County, at 2:15 p.m. Witnesses on Hwy 1 reported a motorist starting multiple fires. This hasn't been confirmed but there are at least four confirmed sources for the spot fires that have now spread to five hundred acres between the airport and Seascape golf course. Hwy 1 S is closed from Freedom Blvd on, Hwy 1 N is closed at Airport. Traffic has backed up for miles and emergency vehicles are making their way through with great difficulty. Some structures are burning and homes have been evacuated with a reverse 911 call. I heard phone interviews with residents who could see their homes were not burning or surrounded  by fire who were determined to jump the fence at the airport to get past the police and rescue pets. Smoke is billowing in a huge mushroom like cloud because there is no wind blowing it away. The humidity is only eleven per cent right now and it's blistering hot--in the nineties. Let's hope the... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1424/Yet_another_Santa_Cruz_County_Fire Sat, 21 Jun 2008 00:06:36 -0000 Sudden Death My husband wanted to understand how Tim Russert could die of a heart attack so suddenly when he was on medication and exercising regularly, dieting to lose weight, and so on. Why, he wondered, does someone die when they are managing their risks and doing well? Russert passed a treadmill test in April and had just used a treadmill for exercise that morning with no apparent problems. His heart disease was still asymptomatic--no chest pain, no trouble getting out of breath with exertion or fatigue, and it was being well-managed. (Note that you can be up to 75% blocked by plaque in one or more arteries and still pass a treadmill test. I passed one in 1999, just two years before my quadruple bypass.) One of the features of heart disease is, indeed, the suddenness with which it takes its victims. With other diseases there are usually the warning symptoms and then a diagnosis and a warning that death may occur within a certain time frame if treatment is not an option. The patient's condition m... http://tapatim.multiply.com/journal/item/1423/Sudden_Death Mon, 16 Jun 2008 20:35:58 -0000